Commentator Grace Lin first dreamed of becoming an illustrator. Then she realized she wanted to write books, too. Now she does both, and is identified as a “multicultural children’s book author/illustrator.” For Lin, that extra-adjective — multi-cultural — was a surprise at first.

When I published my first book — a story about my Asian family and the Chinese vegetables we grew when I was a child — I was thinking only about my personal story. So it was surprising to hear a fellow striving-author/illustrator say to me, ‘It’s good that you’re using your culture — multicultural books are hot now. That’s what’s getting you published.’

Was it? Suddenly, my joy that I had broken through the publishing wall was marred by the idea that I’d somehow squeezed through a back window. Was I only getting published because of my heritage and subject matter?

This fear haunted me. During that first year of publication, I constantly felt ill at ease. I hadn’t intended on getting on a platform for diversity in children’s literature — I had just wanted to get a story I loved published. But suddenly my book was seen as representative of the under-served Asian-American experience.

And who was I to represent that? I felt, in my desperation to get published, I’d faked my way in.

Soon after, during discussions for another project, my editor asked me to change my Asian girl character to a Caucasian boy. I knew I should have felt satisfaction and relief. The editor’s reasons were good — changing the character would make it so that the book wouldn’t be multicultural; its sales wouldn’t be limited; and I, as an author, wouldn’t be pigeon-holed.

But, instead, I was even more uneasy. I knew creating Asian-American books meant my books might not have a broad appeal, and that others would always think that I was selling out my culture for a career. But proving I was publishable without my heritage seemed pale consolation compared to creating a book that was true to my vision, and to the child I once was.

It’s not that I’ll never do a book with a Caucasian boy — I’d do a book on anything if it felt right– or that the books I do publish are meant to preach, but being able to publish my work is a gift not to be squandered on something soulless. And my soul is Asian-American.

Ironically, it was this editor’s request that sifted away my fears. Now, instead of worrying about being called a multicultural author and illustrator, I’m proud of that extra-adjective, and of who I am.

Grace Lin is the multicultural author and illustrator of more than a dozen children’s books, including “The Ugly Vegetables” and “Where the Mountain Meets the Moon.”